Share on facebook
Share on twitter
Share on linkedin
Share on email
Share on stumbleupon
Share on email

I remember dressing up

as Salvador Dali

for a Carnival parade at school

somewhere between 2009

and the end of my teenage years.

 

My young face, rounder

than it is today, reflecting in

the mirror of the girls bathroom

as I was drawing the famous moustache,

ignoring the pounding heart and the shaky hands.

 

My shoulders, slightly broader in the shirt and jacket

borrowed from my grand father’s closet.

I remember how everybody laughed at my costume

and how I didn’t. The way the tie felt around my neck

and how even that day they still used the word girl.

 

A year ago, lifting the collar of my shirt

with tears in my eyes to put on my first

ever bow tie, I met the eyes of

my reflection in the mirror again.

Handsome, daring and alive.

 

Have you ever bumped into a childhood friend

and wondered if you should introduce

yourself or if they remembered you

as much as you remembered them ?

Coming out feels like that sometimes.

 

My grandfather has been dead

for seven years now

and I wonder if

my grandmother has kept

some of his clothes.

Jo Matsaeff (they/them) is a neurodivergent queer teacher based in France. Their work focuses on mental health, trauma and queerness. They can be found at their local open mic or virtually hanging out with their international poet friends wishing for a day when a magical tunnel will bring them all together.

 

hot july night by eric short

In your bed, pretending to sleep, secretly counting fan blades like flower petals, wondering He loves me, He loves me not, He loves me. Thank god there are five.  

Marlee Head Headshot

The End by Marlee Head

Grief is the silence that burdens the sound — one house, two homes two minds, the bones of all that hurts and remains.   The moon is hung with echoes

Michelle Eccellente Stevenson author photo

Venom by Michelle Eccellente Stevenson

Standing in the checkout line, I waved hello, but I didn’t recognize you. Once amicable, previously approachable, you were not there.   Disturbed, but not surprised, I recalled hints of

connect

we love hearing from you. tell us everything